Furthest From My Thoughts,

I'm back again. although I'm pretty sure I'm the nly one to read this, but none the less here I am. Life is a strange entitiy. I don't know if I am better or worse since I left that last rather depressing post on here, all I know is I am alive. Here. And I have no idea how I let myself fall to where I am.

I tried everything I could think of not to end up rightwhere I am...working a low paying job which I hated and living at home, deeply in debt, and alone. Sometimes I think fate has it in for my...or perhaps my fear of this end made me what I am today. Who can really tell? And what is the point of rambling on about it you ask? Maybe there is no point other than once I thought I could be somebody. Once I imagined a life where I was moderatly happy. Once I was sure I wouldn't end up 25 and unable to feel, to smile, to know anyone at all.

Once the girl I was dreamed of myths and heroes and reality was furthest from my thoughts.

Jade